Yesterday, I thought I knew where room #5 was. Today, I realized I wasn’t really paying attention when the gentleman greeter showed me the way. You enter the building, obtain hand sanitizer, turn right, go up a flight of stairs, go outside, go up the outside stairs, and make a left. I was nearly late because I could not remember all the ins and outs, turns, and climbs.

Update: We have another student in class, representing Chile.

Caroline, « la professeure pas le professeur » (France is slow to adopt gender specifics when it comes to professions, but they’re doing it and apparently Canada is showing them the way!), but I digress. Caroline showed us a short cut for reaching her room #5, and we all nodded and smiled at the newfound knowledge of this secret route which doesn’t involve exiting and re-entering the building. She led us the whole way to the cafeteria for « la pause. »

I have to say this group hasn’t jelled as quickly as last semester’s group. It’s just not as friendly yet. I know, it’s only day 2. At any rate, we all sat together for coffee, and exchanged a few pleasantries. In French, « bien sûr.» In no time, our 20 minutes passed and we all promptly rose from the table, and started to make our way back to class. Well, three of us lagged a little behind and basically got lost. Again. The funny thing is, two of us followed the first student with blind loyalty — right into the rest room. Nope, that’s not it! We laughed, but we seriously had to split up to check alternate routes. We finally made it to the classroom, laughing. We were like a walking joke: A surgeon, engineer, and artist all walked into a room…

When Caroline asked me if she could use my scarf, I didn’t hesitate. It was hanging there, visible to all, and I assumed she wanted to use it for vocabulary. So, imagine my surprise when she proceeded to wrap it around her fist, and KNOT it into a ball, chatting nonstop the whole time, as she prepared for our next exercise. My jaw dropped, as I tried to find the words. Before I could, she’d tossed the balled-up scarf into the air, and then to a student. He missed it. It fell to the floor. The object of this game/lesson was to say WHERE you came from and WHERE you would like to go, tossing the “ball” to the person in class from the country you’d like to visit. What makes it tricky is using the correct gender and preposition for each country. (And of course, if vowels are involved, those rules go out the window!)

Things were happening fast. I was about to say something, scream, when my friend from Turkey tossed my lovely scarf to me. It went high, but I knew I was going to catch it no matter what! I did. I then, gently untangled it and held it, nervously laughing as I said:

Je suis désolée, mais cette écharpe était un cadeau de mon mari, et c’était très chère.

The room erupted in hilarity. Oh my God! Ah la vache! Holy Cow! The woman from Brazil, who knows quality when she sees it, was beside herself! She carried on in a tizzy, exclaiming to anyone who would listen. Sacrilege! My own humor was high, but definitely tinged with horror. Thankfully, my Burberry raw silk scarf was none the worse for wear — or play. I thought la professeure might die of embarrassment and laughter. It really was a sitcom scenario. Mais, mon Dieu!

After the frivolity, we got serious and revisited demonstrative pronouns. Le sigh. Alas, as much as we don’t use them en anglais, and find them clunky, awkward, and superfluous — they use them like MAD in French. Imagine saying: The knife, with which I have need of, is on the table.

So, I’m tired. I had a lot of homework, and most of it had to do with those pesky pronouns. Other languages use them, so it’s easier for some students in the class. They do these exercises quickly. « Pas moi! » Not yet, anyway. It’s taking me longer. It’s one thing to figure out in English, but that’s truly a waste of my time because they don’t translate the same. Each of them means almost the same thing in English: who/whom/that/which, so I’m trying to memorize the rules.

The head with which I used to think all day is in need of rest or wine or both.

À mercredi!